Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Anyway,there was this folk dance competition yesterday and we volunteered to watch it so that we'd mishsh our mathsh clashsh.We did miss.How frustrated can a person get when she says,"Let's attend the Maths class instead." All the dances were THAT bad.
Also,a human had come to advertise the availability of the illustrated version of Oxford dictionary.He spent five minutes in cleaning his teeth with his tongue.Two minutes to fake an American accent.One minute to be laughed at. :D
Today,there was a classical solo dance competition.There was this girl in red who almost seduced some people.That was when I kept reminding myself "You are straight like a ruler." and narrowly escaped it.The song went like "Mohe Chum Le..." and I swear most had an orgasm.Okhay,exaggerating.But you get the idea,right?
Then there was this girl who danced...ermm..beautifully.Let's call her Snehashish Agarwal* and assume that the name is for a female.She kicked,punched,made weird faces,jumped about like a bunny rabbit.And I've decided to become a dancer now.Even I can do all that.
S looked pretty!She always does.Too bad she came out third.But still,that was something!
A retired art/craft teacher was invited for judgment.In those days she was famous for, "Sister,pot in my hand,pot in the ground,pot pottaash!" and "I have a husband,two male sons and a female daughter." Those were bright,colourful days.And with the microphone in her hand gripped tightly lest it pottaashes she said things like "All are winners,losers not heart,I miss you,I thank Sister,all of you my,the mudra was nice,very nice.Thank you." *claps* "I'd like to thank sister,my all of you,I miss you.The dances was nice." *claps* "I'd like to thank my staff.I love it here." *claps* "Tahole ekhon Bangla tei boli,mon theke...." *yawns* Question:Should we clap?
Anyway,after giving the translated speech,off the stage she went.I am not a perfectionist,I don't even hate humans who talk like that...but how the hell can you prevent yourself from laughing when a 'pot pottaashes'?
*Name changed for ensuring the longevity of my life
Friday, August 22, 2008
Sacks can't challege paper and you can't challenge me.Paper maketh cartoon and sacks maketh ermm...errm..loser cartoons. :D
Anyway,this is the unfinished mascot,her monologue is "Khadi condom is my birthright and I shall have it." If you have a bright brain,you may suggest better lines which you won't because Green Revolution destroyed the brain power.Sacks can't make Bangladeshi Flags,can they? :D Okhay,save rubber trees,enjoy it! ;)
Disclaimer:The characters who are the mastermind behind the loser ideas and the events depicted here are fictitious.Any similarity to actual dumbasses living or dead,is purely co-incidental.
Disclaimer 2:This post is for fun!Cheers!
Update:I changed the blog template.Blame my passionate state of mind.I'll miss the glittering fairy though...I'll put up her picture here.My tribute.
This template has 3 sidebars...that's supposed to be better than one.And it has got all that I wanted,a black base,and my recent passionate attack[read:red] and butterflies,for those who are close friends,old friends...they'll know that butterflies have been my favourite.Okhay,now,the final question:What do you think about this template?Think and see and you can tell me "I love it!" in the bus stand or in the class.No other comment other than "I love it!" will be accepted,morons.
See you in the display board competition tomorrow then.Luck.Love.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Guess what?My mother was getting ready for work and T.D. throws up if she gets to see such dirty thing,hot out of the stomach...SO they both went like,"Okhay you clean it."It's not even a request!It's like "We aren't cleaning it,so you'll have to do it,unless you want it to look like a Railway Station's Lavatory."And I DID!*pukes again* And my mum comes and pours water over the remaining yellow-yellow thing *gets hospitalized* so that it doesn't get sticky and TD goes like,"What will the mother-in-law say if you can't do such things?" Why?WHY?Jesus,WHY?
AND I CLEAN THAT TOO!I MOP THE FLOOR!And then I try to sprinkle the Phenyl and wow!Someone has removed the stopper so I pour a lot of phenyl instead and clean up the phenyl too and my house has started to smell like a Government Hospital where there's only phenyl and no doctor.
Monday, August 18, 2008
So what if it's more important for him to sleep soundly then to guard the house?
So what if he's small?
So what if he eats up insects?
So what if he's not photogenic?
So what if he's looking like a rat here?
Then so fucking what?
He's the best one in the world.
And I think he looks like a prince!
Today is V.A's birthday and the first thing I did in the morning was to wish her a belated birthday.That was me.
Update:I am/was really sick which is why I had decided to skip the party which I'd almost do if they wouldn't flood me with calls...incessant calls.It felt like it was my birthday and so if I wouldn't be there then "No party children,go home" kinda situation would take place,so I went; the birthday girl looked pretty so did M and U and I looked like a slug,like I always do.Oh wait,U:You're looking like,you are blushing for no apparent reason.Yes,so a blushing slug.Cute!And the rest is a secret,but a readable secret nevertheless.
Hint:If it's a prime minister,you elect for clothes you ________?That word is a hint.
So okhay,we go to a bar cum lounge and guess what we end up going inside the bar which has bar dancers,instead of the lounge.And then with each step more and more sniggers reach my ears and I go like "Ram Ram" .Anyway a waiter says,"Ma'am....family lounge?"And we all say YES! and we come to the lounge a breathe freely.For the first time in my life I saw a bar dancer and she was vulgar.Okhay,next we drink beer. =P Then I try mint food to get rid of the smell.Then we go out after getting drunk and we head towards another resto,we eat nice food there,then eat/drunk slush and then a muffin and head towards home.I was on a rickshaw then,incase you didn't know Bangladesh has the highest number of rickshaw and Silly,the second highest.We made a record.YAY!So yea whatever,I was in a rick and some good looking,tall,decent,literate guy suddenly came beside the rick,riding slowly to keep pace.And he spoke good English,didn't sound like he was trying for the first time.
Stranger:May we talk for a while somewhere?
Me:*No-nonsense-look*We may not.
Stranger:Please?A conversation?It won't take long!
Me:*still holding that no-nonsense-look*Look,I'm seeing someone and I think our conversation is SO over!
Then it started raining.This was the first time a decent looking,educated person did that.I whine so much in the blog and when it's time for action I become an over-smart actor who's seeing someone.Christ,why?Why am I so stereotype?
Anyway,thanks for that ego boost Mr. Whatever-your-name-is.You convinced me that every slug has its day! :)
Friday, August 15, 2008
We didn't have our parade.Bwafafahaha!Call that a weather malfunctioning.
We had Fr.Erwin as our chief guest.He said things like "Independence shouldn't be like my untamed hair,it should be like your neatly tied hair." Right.Whatever that meant.He's a nice man though very unsuccessful,for his jokes are usually accompanied by grunts more than laughs. =))
Anyway,we bought gifts for V.A.'s birthday.
Why I clicked the picture is because that bow on the gift makes it look like an insect.Take a closer look,see if you can figure out the antennae.Also,the card is very apt for the situation.I hope it's more than a pint or two for me.We bought that casket because we had extra money with us.Best part is everything was bought according to my choice.I don't mean to brag...well,I'll just boast.I BUY THE BEST THINGS!I think I'm done. :D
THAT'S PROBABLY THE BEST PART OF MY LIFE!Papa brought those.Are you envious?Tell me you are!Hence,from today,the synonym for luck will be 'J'.I can't believe all these will make into my mouth! :O You should. :D
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
From today everytime I call you a 'Hebron' you'll read it as 'asshole'.
That's right,I make my own synonyms.
The parade pratice for 15th August got started.We stand height-wise in a descending order.
The first time we gave it a try,it started drizzling,then downpouring!
And for the first time,in a long time I bowed my head and prayed and sang "God is so good".
Next time the old fellow ditched me.
When I say parade practise,you needn't laugh at me,I do it pretty well.You should see a few people marching.I really can't seem to figure out HOW THE HELL THEY MANAGE TO SHAKE THEIR BUTTS SO MUCH WHILE MARCHING!
But that isn't much of a problem.The Hebron who stands behind me is!
Hebron:Eh,listen!When you go wrong,I'll say "Hey you!You are going wrong!"
What the fuck is that,now?
Hebron:Don't talk!That is the rule!
Hebron:Hey you!Jog!That is the rule!
Hebron:Hey you!Don't sit here!
Hebron:No,you shouldn't THAT is the rule!
Me:Fuck you!Fuck your rules!
Hebron:Hey you!You're taller than her,stand before her.
Hebron:That is the rule!
Me:*dies and goes to Heaven and punches God for creating the Hebron!*
You get the hint?YOU GET THE HINT AT ALL?!
Also,we'll have our display board competition sometime in the next week.Topic is AIDS.
These are the various ideas from various people:
P:There'll be two charts-one on the advantages of AIDS,one on the disadvantages.
D:We can draw in a chart too.One man will cut his hand and the girlfriend will suck the blood and get AIDS.
D:Or we can draw sexual intercourse too. =/
Me:Yes,in a black chart paper we'll write "Here two people are having sex in the dark.You can't see it pervert!" =))
A:No!We'll draw prostitutes!*giving an i'm-so-intelligent look*
Me:Somebody kill this cracker!
Sunday, August 10, 2008
1.There was a dance presented by Air Force School yesterday which was supposedly based on "Prevent Water Pollution".A few steel coloured boys came and danced,one had a flabby chest. :P
Then two copper coloured girls danced and then there was a long blue cloth and lastly the fisherwomen came and the flabby chest fell in love and I pressed my hands to my ears because they created noise pollution.
2.DBS dancers are boneless chickens.
3.We secured the 2nd position...the first is out of consideration.It's reserved for cheater cocks EXCLUSIVELY!
4.People find the MC cute.Haw!
psst!ppsst!I think the Mc is cute too. =P
5.This was the last Fest for me. :'(
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
I didn't go to school.*turns devil*
I enjoyed a first class edible Friendship Day.If only friendship was edible.Bands were ruled out for me this year.Just edible material,so I have got a whole granary here.
I have learnt Pashto.
See-->Da ze ziba watan,da ze ma dada watan.And if the English translation wouldn't be written,I'd think that it means:The ze ziba country,The ze mother-brother country.
There has been a phone call recently from a caller who loves pretending that he's an animal.So it's entertaining and I don't hang up anymore instead encourage him to bring out his undaar ki aatma. I can bring out those sounds better than him though.
I've been watching a lot of cooking shows,I don't cook any better now however.Cooking the food is easy:Boil the food,don't mix spices,cook with wine and things you can't think of eating with,make it the least edible.....and you've made your first non-Indian food.Smart,eh?
As for the woman in the previous doodle-post--I've mugged up the fact that this woman is a sad,pathetic women.It's a birth defect.Her questions and comments are replied to with grunts and smirks these days and if the next post is captioned as "I got suspended for a week from school" don't look suprised at all.
Scouts' Fiesta now known as Bosco Fest will be held on this Saturday.Wheee!If you're reading this Sayan dada you can expect to read some facts on the current 'pathetic-loser-generation' of Boscoites thriving in the school on this Saturday.The school's running out of cute single UHOs[read:Unidentified Handsome Objects]. =P
And anyway,you know that I've my eyes only on you. *guess guess* ;)
Also,I bought a new diary for my journal entries and it's so cool!I can't take my eyes off it.So now it's famously known as my new bride in my household.Courtesy:Mum.
It looks like a chess board-my new bride,my noor.
That was her.
Con amore. (: