Hum Ladki Dekhne Aaye Hai

So my neighbour Bill and I have the same maid,or household helper-whichever word you prefer.
And she's as old as my mom or Bill's,and is a granny already.[please note:mine or Bill's mom isn't 50 years old,if that pea-sized brain of yours assumed so].
So this lady named something,I know not of,known worldwide as 'Mashi' has a daughter of 17.
No,Bill didn't get her pregnant,how could you even think of it?So the daughter named 'Nandita'
is supposed to be getting married to a driver named something.And he has already gone through the "Hum Ladki Dekhne Aaye Hai" phase once and has undergone through that phase for the second time,and eventually both the times it was with the same girl.Yes,i'm talking about Nandita.The first time,he met her,she already started acting like his wife,forcing a sweet down his mother's throat.Poor,poor mother!Somehow her red sari and golden coloured jewellery was a drastic contrast to her umm....complexion.I'm not a rascist by any means,it's just that "The less,the better".So she got rejected the first time after exchanging phone numbers.

Anyway,he came to meet Nandita again today with his whole family,at Bill's house.She wore the
red sari and her golden-coloured jewellery,and dyed her hair,mahogany.[ewwww!]I and Bill were,so happy,everything was so nice.Bill kept murmuring this throughout "Jai Maa Kali,Jai Maa Kali,Tere Vachaan,Na jaye khabi khali".If your head is not entirely vacuum,you'll understand what that vagabond actually meant.No,he's not a rascist either,he's got a big,black dog.

So yea,this driver fella went to the loo at a point of time,and came back as quickly as he went.And trust me,Bill's got a strong binocular vision.And the next thing he says is "CHECK YOUR FLY!"[translated].The driver looks down,humiliated,his face as red as wild cherries,apparently
gloating and swearing to kill Bill at the noon of the night.He puts up a big fake smile and says "OH!" and pulls up his zip.
We all observe a minute of silence,everyone trying to supress his/her uncontrolled laughter.

But hopefully,they'll get married and live happily ever after.....
....and get the population even higher.
And yea,he says that he doesn't like Mahogany dye.